Parenting is an uphill battle. It is a journey of never-ending twists and turns where your temper is put to trial and test your anger management. You pull out all the stops, so your kid makes headway at each step of the way.
Being a model dad for the mini version of you isn’t a piece of cake. You may feel overworked, financially stressed or, you could have differences with your spouse. On top of it all, your kids could be driving you nuts!
We all have unique things in our life that would trigger our anger. Sometimes, it is merely because you had a sleepless night, and you take it out on your loved ones. Is it normal? Yes. Is it justified? No!
As a father, you must learn not to lose your temper. If you don’t, it obstructs your child’s healthy mental development, and you end up raising a toxic son/daughter. Home, a safe place for the residents, turns into a dreadful place to be.
Before that happens, you must equip yourself with valuable information. If you are prone to snap at people around and known for a short temper, it is about time you start working on it.
We have rounded up a list of anger management tips for dads-to-be. Take it as a new dad’s survival guide and initiate implementation ASAP!
Know Your Triggers
Being proactive in our mindset lets us know when and where to tame our temper. Just about everyone has some emotional triggers. Most men have an atom’s weight of patience when they wake up in the morning, get back from work, or right before they hit the bed.
Men need to realize what issues promote a high alert in their brains and send them over an edge. Eventually, they can learn to ace their anger and provide an intentional response, hopefully aborting the episodes.
Little kids won’t ask why dads are so annoying. Instead, they slowly drift away from him, suppressing their feelings and feeling scared.
Try to Calm Down
It is not simple to transition from an angry state to a relaxed one when surrounded continuously by aggravating situations. But, there are ways to decelerate the feelings and calm down steadily.
Keep in mind, the feelings of guilt and regret might engulf you if you let anger overpower you. The easiest way to do so is by breathing. Three deep breaths are all you need to calm down and display a sophisticated response in the heat of the moment.
Children often complain about why dads are so annoying because most fathers fail to fathom the art of staying calm. No matter if you are a new or old dad, take some time for yourself, away from the children.
Here are some ideas worth trying:
- Go out for a walk or a jog
- Take a warm shower
- Do something to relax like reading
- Have a conversation with a friend
The good thoughts and distraction will make you trump the resentful feelings that ignite your temper.
Seek Professional Help
Extreme mental and physical exhaustion manifests itself in bouts of anger. Your kids need you to have it together, so there is no shame in seeking professional assistance when things get worse. There are anger management treatment programs and therapies that help people to curb their anger.
You will feel under pressure at some points in the parenting endeavor. A growth spurt in baby boys is one example where dads often think they will fail. Asking for help in such scenarios will turn out favorable not only for your mental health but for your child too.
The National Childbirth Trust surveyed between 2013 and 2014. They discovered that among the 296 new fathers surveyed, over one-third (38%) said they were concerned about their mental health.
New fathers often have a tough time finding a balance now as they have a new priority. Look for a reliable support program that will help you eliminate the doubts and improve your parental skills. Or better yet, add it to your checklist when you write a list of items needed for the new baby.
Reflect on the Situation
If you have any issues with something or someone, give it a thought and reflect on how to deal with them in the future. Some questions to ask yourself are:
- How can I sort out this situation?
- Is it important? Why do I get upset by it?
- Do I need to do something or let it go?
A mature reflection session by yourself will make oodles of difference in your future dealings with the same scenario. As we said earlier, there is no framework on how to be an ideal father. It comes to you as you keep heading ahead.
Make up for the Fiery Episodes
Parents usually feel mounting guilt when the kid goes to bed. All those moments when you yelled at them or ignored them come haunting at you.
We suggest you take some time to work out and say the following things to your child:
- “I am sorry I yelled. Can we discuss what happened earlier?”
- “I am sorry for losing my temper. I am going to be more tolerant next time.”
- “I am sorry I should not react so abruptly!”
This way, your child will feel you are human and becomes more compassionate towards you.
It is not always roses and rainbows when a new baby enters the world. Instead, it is a whole load of additional baggage that is delicate and precious. Ensure you are there for your child at every step if you want to watch them grow into confident human beings!